I have spent way too much of my life looking like a bad “before” photo. It is embarrassing to admit how many pairs of baggy, knit pants I own – some with elastic waists, some with tie waists, none with fitted waists. I have them in a range of sizes, matching my years of changing weight. Some fit snugly; some bag on my butt and droop in the crotch; none are flattering or stylish. One favorite pair is so worn in the waist that I keep waiting for it to fall apart, and so faded that the original black now looks dark green.
Every summer, when I switch to equally forgiving knit dresses, I vow that it would finally be the year I toss those pants and buy great fitting and looking jeans. One year I actually did just that. I was thrilled to discover that I could fit into an acceptable (to me) size. It had been so many years since I had bought jeans that I was pleasantly surprised by the addition of lycra – stretch in jeans, yahoo. Those jeans are sitting in my closet, too small, again.
I have a love/hate relationship with my stupid knit pants. I love the ease and comfort. I hate… how I look in them, that they allow me room to gain weight, that they symbolize that I have gained weight, that I wear them year after year after year, that I can’t wait to get back into them after the rare occasions when I have to wear “real” clothes, that I gave in and bought new ones this year:(
Every time I reach my weight goal I think about tossing those pants, but never do. Maybe I will want to be comfortable on a plane ride; maybe they will be good for the next time I paint walls; maybe I should just keep them in the back of the closet “just because”. I know that this time I need to bite the bullet and throw them away. But I admit that I am breaking into a sweat just thinking about it!
Beloved pants…hated pants…comfy pants…ugly pants…ancient pants…not-fit-for-being-seen-in-public pants… Soon to be ex-pants:)